Ramblings: Self Booking

Ramblings: Self Booking

There was a time not too long ago when I was booking my band 2-5 nights a
week by myself, booking for local 2 clubs, and taking other gigs. My
calendar was always full, as were my days - making packages, taking cold
calls or following up with clubs, taking calls from other bands, driving
across town to give some club owner a package for the 5th time, calling my
guys with details about the next gig, etc.

I spent my breaks outlining the finer points of the contract to the client,
cutting checks, putting out fires, etc. I always knew what I was doing on
NYE by August at the latest. One time, I actually had SIX different offers
for NYE...in August.

I loved it. I especially loved it when I pulled off a coup: like getting a
CEO to write me a $1000 check for an extra hour of playing time, taking a
nice big chunk off the top of each gig, or finagling a check, period, when
we showed up to a wash-out with no contract.


But all things must come to an end. For a variety of economic, political,
and health reasons, I had to step back from all of that. Like jeff, I was
just burnt out.The stress of having to be "in charge" and in "ass kicking"
mode all the time, combined with a chronic illness, really took it's toll.

I made enemies out of friends because they couldn't differentiate between
business and personal, which sucked. I also found out who my friends WERE,
and who was just kissing my ass.

And I got REALLY tired of having to gear my set list to the fickle idiots -
one eye on the crowd, the other eye on the manager, one ear on the volume -
I barely had a chance to think about what *I* wanted to play.

So when the bottom fell out of the local scene around '05, I took some time
away from it all - I got a cushy zero pressure church gig, and started
working as a side man doing private/society and select pick up gigs. I
resolved to keep my mouth shut, to go with the flow, to play what's needed,
to refrain from offering unsolicited gig advice, to refrain from bitching
about tunes, or breaks, or pay. I was going to be the ideal side man, I
thought, since I know how hard it is to lead...

I was ALSO going to take a lot of non-paying gigs, since the society gigs
paid very well. And I'd have some weekends free for the wife. It's
win/win/win.


And this arrangement has worked fairly well for the last couple years,
severely erratic schedules notwithstanding.

However, the "go along to get along" mentality has been wearing at me like
Niagara Falls on a pebble.

Some examples:


1) The church I play at has a LOT of internal politics, most of which I stay
away from. However, a big political issue is running sound. Two guys have
staked a claim on is, and neither now ANYTHING about running sound.

One day I come in to play (we're not allowed to use amps onstage; everything
goes direct), and there is a massive noise gate on my bass. I have to hit
the string so hard that it buzzed against the fretboard. I ask the soundguy
to turn off the noise gate, please...What SHOULD have been a 10 second
operation turned into a week plus aggravation. They had NO IDEA what noise
gate was or how it turn it off; they were trying to blame ME...and all the
wile I was "strongly encouraged" not to interfere. Finally one day I frikin
had it, snuck up to the soundboard, and basically TOLD the guy where the
gate was and how to turn it off. Problem solved. I fully expected to be let
go for that "transgression", but nothing happened.

2) I've tried to book several original projects, without much success -
mostly because the guy that formed the project can't do it. What's
frustrating is that I go in with a businesslike attitude, and I'm confronted
with hipsters and gatekeepers and cliques the likes of which I haven't seen
since high school.

Now, you gotta remember - I never did the "battle of the bands showcase"
thing. I went from playing in my basement to playing 4 nights a week, as a
tennager. So the original music scene is a bit foreign to me.

Apparently, in this scene you are supposed to kiss the ever-loving ass of
the person who is in charge of booking XYZ venue, and bend over backwards to
convince them that you "want it" more than any other band - all for the
"privilege" of playing for free. FOR FREE!

I, on the other hand, go in with the attitude that I am PROVIDING you with
a band that can actually play their instruments, can control their volume,
won't drive away paying customers, and is the perfect sound for the genre
you are booking. In return you will give me a spot on the bill to showcase
my group and sell CDs.

And no, I'm not bringing you a "draw" for free. There is NO RISK whatsoever
to you, so what does it matter if 1 or 1000 people are watching me play? I
on the other hand, have to schlep my gear across town, set up, play and
break down - a labor for whaich I am usually paid in money rather than
sandwiches. I'll bug Aunt Mabel to come see me when I have a PAYING "draw
vs. the door" gig, thanks.

Such logic is not what they want to hear. It takes every ounce of strength
for me not to just blurt out "Who the FUCK do you think you are, manpurse?".
I see the young kids kiss ass to these hipsters, and I want to bitchslap
them.


3) I "almost" did a gig last week with a young original singer I work with.
Actually turned down a paying gig to do this one. She's nice, but not real
good on follow-through - giving details to the band, communicating with the
venue, planning the trip, etc.

Gig was about 90 miles north of Charlotte. About halfway there, she says
"I've been trying to call this club all week, but the number is
disconnected. Do you think we should still go?"

Were there not a fantastic brew pub close by the club where I knew she would
buy us sympathy drinks, I would have told her to turn around.

Instead we get there - 90 min. late, incidentally - and the place is OPEN.
She had the wrong number. I got shitfaced at the pub down the street.

Now, I COULD take care of all the details FOR her - and part of me really,
REALLY wants to - but it would be a major pain in the ass for me (see #1),
and she wouldn't learn a thing.


4) Did a gig tonight with a great player who's new in town. He booked a gig
at a club I used to play regularly. One day, they switched from paying a
flat fee to some sort of "tiered" system based on the till. I don't like or
trust those kinds of gigs, so I stopped playing there. This guy quoted me a
flat fee at the old rate though, so I assumed the old system was back.

Gig goes well, with a typical thin Friday turnout for that place. Manager
tells us to knock off early - which *I* know means "get the fuck out of
here, I want to close up". I try to tell the leader this, but he insists on
playing 2 more songs, I guess thinking he will impress them. All the while I
have a sneaking suspicion that we're not gonna get a guarantee...

It takes every ounce of self control for me to keep from saying "Look, they
don't give a fuck, because we're not getting the "big money" tonight anyway.
Start packing up."

Sure enough, the leader comes back all pissed off, trying to figure out how
to tell us. I just cut him off and said "I know"...


Point being, I would have gotten all that shit squared away up front. Or got
the money I thought I was promised. But I'm just the sideman...



Sorry if this is just a rambling, pointless diatribe. The gist of it is that
I'm both frustrated and torn. On one hand, I'm starting to crack from the
pressure of being the "go along" guy, which I am most certainly not. On
another, although I'm healthy again, I dread the massive stress and time
constraints of being "in charge" again, and I'm in no hurry to be pulled
back into that.

I don't know what to do.

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

Well, fwiw, you can take some solace in the fact that what you consider your
'rambling, pointless diatribe' is actually fascinating reading for a typical
'weekend warrior' like myself. I think it's interesting as hell reading
about all the stuff you deal with as a professional musician, reading from
my perspective as a relaxed nine-to-fiver who just happens to play an
instrument from time to time. All the many things you deal with regularly,
many of which pull you back and forth like a piece of taffy, are things I
occasionally wish I had the opportunity to deal with myself. Of course, the
grass is always greener, etc, and if I'd been dealing with it for years the
way you have, no doubt I'd have had enough of it years ago. Even though I'm
not one of those I-gave-up-music-to-chase-a-career guys (I'm more of a
just-plain-lazy-to-the-core guy), in retrospect I wish I originally would
have had more interest in pursuing music as a career, and reading of your
many travails, even the exhausting, hair-pulling ones, I routinely find
myself thinking that you must consider yourself a lucky guy to be in that
position...

David


"js" <nothing AT nothing DOT com> wrote in message
news:4812f5fe$0$7726$4c368faf@roadrunner . com ...
> There was a time not too long ago when I was booking my band 2-5 nights a
> week by myself, booking for local 2 clubs, and taking other gigs. My
> calendar was always full, as were my days - making packages, taking cold
> calls or following up with clubs, taking calls from other bands, driving
> across town to give some club owner a package for the 5th time, calling my
> guys with details about the next gig, etc.
>
> I spent my breaks outlining the finer points of the contract to the
> client,
> cutting checks, putting out fires, etc. I always knew what I was doing on
> NYE by August at the latest. One time, I actually had SIX different offers
> for NYE...in August.
>
> I loved it. I especially loved it when I pulled off a coup: like getting a
> CEO to write me a $1000 check for an extra hour of playing time, taking a
> nice big chunk off the top of each gig, or finagling a check, period, when
> we showed up to a wash-out with no contract.
>
>
> But all things must come to an end. For a variety of economic, political,
> and health reasons, I had to step back from all of that. Like jeff, I was
> just burnt out.The stress of having to be "in charge" and in "ass kicking"
> mode all the time, combined with a chronic illness, really took it's toll.
>
> I made enemies out of friends because they couldn't differentiate between
> business and personal, which sucked. I also found out who my friends WERE,
> and who was just kissing my ass.
>
> And I got REALLY tired of having to gear my set list to the fickle
> idiots -
> one eye on the crowd, the other eye on the manager, one ear on the
> volume -
> I barely had a chance to think about what *I* wanted to play.
>
> So when the bottom fell out of the local scene around '05, I took some
> time
> away from it all - I got a cushy zero pressure church gig, and started
> working as a side man doing private/society and select pick up gigs. I
> resolved to keep my mouth shut, to go with the flow, to play what's
> needed,
> to refrain from offering unsolicited gig advice, to refrain from bitching
> about tunes, or breaks, or pay. I was going to be the ideal side man, I
> thought, since I know how hard it is to lead...
>
> I was ALSO going to take a lot of non-paying gigs, since the society gigs
> paid very well. And I'd have some weekends free for the wife. It's
> win/win/win.
>
>
> And this arrangement has worked fairly well for the last couple years,
> severely erratic schedules notwithstanding.
>
> However, the "go along to get along" mentality has been wearing at me like
> Niagara Falls on a pebble.
>
> Some examples:
>
>
> 1) The church I play at has a LOT of internal politics, most of which I
> stay
> away from. However, a big political issue is running sound. Two guys have
> staked a claim on is, and neither now ANYTHING about running sound.
>
> One day I come in to play (we're not allowed to use amps onstage;
> everything
> goes direct), and there is a massive noise gate on my bass. I have to hit
> the string so hard that it buzzed against the fretboard. I ask the
> soundguy
> to turn off the noise gate, please...What SHOULD have been a 10 second
> operation turned into a week plus aggravation. They had NO IDEA what noise
> gate was or how it turn it off; they were trying to blame ME...and all the
> wile I was "strongly encouraged" not to interfere. Finally one day I
> frikin
> had it, snuck up to the soundboard, and basically TOLD the guy where the
> gate was and how to turn it off. Problem solved. I fully expected to be
> let
> go for that "transgression", but nothing happened.
>
> 2) I've tried to book several original projects, without much success -
> mostly because the guy that formed the project can't do it. What's
> frustrating is that I go in with a businesslike attitude, and I'm
> confronted
> with hipsters and gatekeepers and cliques the likes of which I haven't
> seen
> since high school.
>
> Now, you gotta remember - I never did the "battle of the bands showcase"
> thing. I went from playing in my basement to playing 4 nights a week, as a
> tennager. So the original music scene is a bit foreign to me.
>
> Apparently, in this scene you are supposed to kiss the ever-loving ass of
> the person who is in charge of booking XYZ venue, and bend over backwards
> to
> convince them that you "want it" more than any other band - all for the
> "privilege" of playing for free. FOR FREE!
>
> I, on the other hand, go in with the attitude that I am PROVIDING you with
> a band that can actually play their instruments, can control their volume,
> won't drive away paying customers, and is the perfect sound for the genre
> you are booking. In return you will give me a spot on the bill to
> showcase
> my group and sell CDs.
>
> And no, I'm not bringing you a "draw" for free. There is NO RISK
> whatsoever
> to you, so what does it matter if 1 or 1000 people are watching me play? I
> on the other hand, have to schlep my gear across town, set up, play and
> break down - a labor for whaich I am usually paid in money rather than
> sandwiches. I'll bug Aunt Mabel to come see me when I have a PAYING "draw
> vs. the door" gig, thanks.
>
> Such logic is not what they want to hear. It takes every ounce of strength
> for me not to just blurt out "Who the FUCK do you think you are,
> manpurse?".
> I see the young kids kiss ass to these hipsters, and I want to bitchslap
> them.
>
>
> 3) I "almost" did a gig last week with a young original singer I work
> with.
> Actually turned down a paying gig to do this one. She's nice, but not real
> good on follow-through - giving details to the band, communicating with
> the
> venue, planning the trip, etc.
>
> Gig was about 90 miles north of Charlotte. About halfway there, she says
> "I've been trying to call this club all week, but the number is
> disconnected. Do you think we should still go?"
>
> Were there not a fantastic brew pub close by the club where I knew she
> would
> buy us sympathy drinks, I would have told her to turn around.
>
> Instead we get there - 90 min. late, incidentally - and the place is OPEN.
> She had the wrong number. I got shitfaced at the pub down the street.
>
> Now, I COULD take care of all the details FOR her - and part of me really,
> REALLY wants to - but it would be a major pain in the ass for me (see
> #1),
> and she wouldn't learn a thing.
>
>
> 4) Did a gig tonight with a great player who's new in town. He booked a
> gig
> at a club I used to play regularly. One day, they switched from paying a
> flat fee to some sort of "tiered" system based on the till. I don't like
> or
> trust those kinds of gigs, so I stopped playing there. This guy quoted me
> a
> flat fee at the old rate though, so I assumed the old system was back.
>
> Gig goes well, with a typical thin Friday turnout for that place. Manager
> tells us to knock off early - which *I* know means "get the fuck out of
> here, I want to close up". I try to tell the leader this, but he insists
> on
> playing 2 more songs, I guess thinking he will impress them. All the while
> I
> have a sneaking suspicion that we're not gonna get a guarantee...
>
> It takes every ounce of self control for me to keep from saying "Look,
> they
> don't give a fuck, because we're not getting the "big money" tonight
> anyway.
> Start packing up."
>
> Sure enough, the leader comes back all pissed off, trying to figure out
> how
> to tell us. I just cut him off and said "I know"...
>
>
> Point being, I would have gotten all that shit squared away up front. Or
> got
> the money I thought I was promised. But I'm just the sideman...
>
>
>
> Sorry if this is just a rambling, pointless diatribe. The gist of it is
> that
> I'm both frustrated and torn. On one hand, I'm starting to crack from the
> pressure of being the "go along" guy, which I am most certainly not. On
> another, although I'm healthy again, I dread the massive stress and time
> constraints of being "in charge" again, and I'm in no hurry to be pulled
> back into that.
>
> I don't know what to do.
>
>

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

PS - I can dig your church story - I played in a church band for a few
years, and while our two sound people were very nice folks rather than
political animals like yours, neither one of them had even the vaguest
notion of what the word 'mix' meant... Best story - while we normally played
mostly contemporary but soft acoustic type of stuff, during one service we
played a real heavy, rocking tune that featured a prominent bass line (I
think it was My Glorious). Our set-up was that while I ran thru a DI to the
board, I also split off from the DI into my bass amp on stage in front of
me, to use it as my monitor. So I had my amp directly in front of me, loud
enough that I could hear myself cleanly through the mix but no louder. Then
after the service, everyone in the congregation is coming up to me telling
me what a great 'air bass' I played on that rocking song we did. I had no
idea what they were talking about. Finally one of the members tells me how
he loved watching how intense I seemed to be playing on that song, but that
there was no bass whatsoever in that song. So I went back into the sanctuary
and checked the board - the input switch on my channel was in the OFF
position! When I caught up with my wife, she confirmed that she didn't hear
me at all through the entire service... Now don't you think a sound person
would notice that the bass was completely missing from the mix? If they had
the even vaguest idea of what a mix was, you would!

However, my wife also confirmed that I was a great 'air bass' player!

David


"js" <nothing AT nothing DOT com> wrote in message
news:4812f5fe$0$7726$4c368faf@roadrunner . com ...
> There was a time not too long ago when I was booking my band 2-5 nights a
> week by myself, booking for local 2 clubs, and taking other gigs. My
> calendar was always full, as were my days - making packages, taking cold
> calls or following up with clubs, taking calls from other bands, driving
> across town to give some club owner a package for the 5th time, calling my
> guys with details about the next gig, etc.
>
> I spent my breaks outlining the finer points of the contract to the
> client,
> cutting checks, putting out fires, etc. I always knew what I was doing on
> NYE by August at the latest. One time, I actually had SIX different offers
> for NYE...in August.
>
> I loved it. I especially loved it when I pulled off a coup: like getting a
> CEO to write me a $1000 check for an extra hour of playing time, taking a
> nice big chunk off the top of each gig, or finagling a check, period, when
> we showed up to a wash-out with no contract.
>
>
> But all things must come to an end. For a variety of economic, political,
> and health reasons, I had to step back from all of that. Like jeff, I was
> just burnt out.The stress of having to be "in charge" and in "ass kicking"
> mode all the time, combined with a chronic illness, really took it's toll.
>
> I made enemies out of friends because they couldn't differentiate between
> business and personal, which sucked. I also found out who my friends WERE,
> and who was just kissing my ass.
>
> And I got REALLY tired of having to gear my set list to the fickle
> idiots -
> one eye on the crowd, the other eye on the manager, one ear on the
> volume -
> I barely had a chance to think about what *I* wanted to play.
>
> So when the bottom fell out of the local scene around '05, I took some
> time
> away from it all - I got a cushy zero pressure church gig, and started
> working as a side man doing private/society and select pick up gigs. I
> resolved to keep my mouth shut, to go with the flow, to play what's
> needed,
> to refrain from offering unsolicited gig advice, to refrain from bitching
> about tunes, or breaks, or pay. I was going to be the ideal side man, I
> thought, since I know how hard it is to lead...
>
> I was ALSO going to take a lot of non-paying gigs, since the society gigs
> paid very well. And I'd have some weekends free for the wife. It's
> win/win/win.
>
>
> And this arrangement has worked fairly well for the last couple years,
> severely erratic schedules notwithstanding.
>
> However, the "go along to get along" mentality has been wearing at me like
> Niagara Falls on a pebble.
>
> Some examples:
>
>
> 1) The church I play at has a LOT of internal politics, most of which I
> stay
> away from. However, a big political issue is running sound. Two guys have
> staked a claim on is, and neither now ANYTHING about running sound.
>
> One day I come in to play (we're not allowed to use amps onstage;
> everything
> goes direct), and there is a massive noise gate on my bass. I have to hit
> the string so hard that it buzzed against the fretboard. I ask the
> soundguy
> to turn off the noise gate, please...What SHOULD have been a 10 second
> operation turned into a week plus aggravation. They had NO IDEA what noise
> gate was or how it turn it off; they were trying to blame ME...and all the
> wile I was "strongly encouraged" not to interfere. Finally one day I
> frikin
> had it, snuck up to the soundboard, and basically TOLD the guy where the
> gate was and how to turn it off. Problem solved. I fully expected to be
> let
> go for that "transgression", but nothing happened.
>
> 2) I've tried to book several original projects, without much success -
> mostly because the guy that formed the project can't do it. What's
> frustrating is that I go in with a businesslike attitude, and I'm
> confronted
> with hipsters and gatekeepers and cliques the likes of which I haven't
> seen
> since high school.
>
> Now, you gotta remember - I never did the "battle of the bands showcase"
> thing. I went from playing in my basement to playing 4 nights a week, as a
> tennager. So the original music scene is a bit foreign to me.
>
> Apparently, in this scene you are supposed to kiss the ever-loving ass of
> the person who is in charge of booking XYZ venue, and bend over backwards
> to
> convince them that you "want it" more than any other band - all for the
> "privilege" of playing for free. FOR FREE!
>
> I, on the other hand, go in with the attitude that I am PROVIDING you with
> a band that can actually play their instruments, can control their volume,
> won't drive away paying customers, and is the perfect sound for the genre
> you are booking. In return you will give me a spot on the bill to
> showcase
> my group and sell CDs.
>
> And no, I'm not bringing you a "draw" for free. There is NO RISK
> whatsoever
> to you, so what does it matter if 1 or 1000 people are watching me play? I
> on the other hand, have to schlep my gear across town, set up, play and
> break down - a labor for whaich I am usually paid in money rather than
> sandwiches. I'll bug Aunt Mabel to come see me when I have a PAYING "draw
> vs. the door" gig, thanks.
>
> Such logic is not what they want to hear. It takes every ounce of strength
> for me not to just blurt out "Who the FUCK do you think you are,
> manpurse?".
> I see the young kids kiss ass to these hipsters, and I want to bitchslap
> them.
>
>
> 3) I "almost" did a gig last week with a young original singer I work
> with.
> Actually turned down a paying gig to do this one. She's nice, but not real
> good on follow-through - giving details to the band, communicating with
> the
> venue, planning the trip, etc.
>
> Gig was about 90 miles north of Charlotte. About halfway there, she says
> "I've been trying to call this club all week, but the number is
> disconnected. Do you think we should still go?"
>
> Were there not a fantastic brew pub close by the club where I knew she
> would
> buy us sympathy drinks, I would have told her to turn around.
>
> Instead we get there - 90 min. late, incidentally - and the place is OPEN.
> She had the wrong number. I got shitfaced at the pub down the street.
>
> Now, I COULD take care of all the details FOR her - and part of me really,
> REALLY wants to - but it would be a major pain in the ass for me (see
> #1),
> and she wouldn't learn a thing.
>
>
> 4) Did a gig tonight with a great player who's new in town. He booked a
> gig
> at a club I used to play regularly. One day, they switched from paying a
> flat fee to some sort of "tiered" system based on the till. I don't like
> or
> trust those kinds of gigs, so I stopped playing there. This guy quoted me
> a
> flat fee at the old rate though, so I assumed the old system was back.
>
> Gig goes well, with a typical thin Friday turnout for that place. Manager
> tells us to knock off early - which *I* know means "get the fuck out of
> here, I want to close up". I try to tell the leader this, but he insists
> on
> playing 2 more songs, I guess thinking he will impress them. All the while
> I
> have a sneaking suspicion that we're not gonna get a guarantee...
>
> It takes every ounce of self control for me to keep from saying "Look,
> they
> don't give a fuck, because we're not getting the "big money" tonight
> anyway.
> Start packing up."
>
> Sure enough, the leader comes back all pissed off, trying to figure out
> how
> to tell us. I just cut him off and said "I know"...
>
>
> Point being, I would have gotten all that shit squared away up front. Or
> got
> the money I thought I was promised. But I'm just the sideman...
>
>
>
> Sorry if this is just a rambling, pointless diatribe. The gist of it is
> that
> I'm both frustrated and torn. On one hand, I'm starting to crack from the
> pressure of being the "go along" guy, which I am most certainly not. On
> another, although I'm healthy again, I dread the massive stress and time
> constraints of being "in charge" again, and I'm in no hurry to be pulled
> back into that.
>
> I don't know what to do.
>
>

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

Is it a "white" church by any chance? If so, it was probably intentional.
Bass and drums are like Kryptonite to the rhythmically challenged...


"dew" <david.warderNO@SPAMtwobelieve . com > wrote in message
news:8f2dna5x5twQwI7VnZ2dnUVZ_gudnZ2d@comcast . com ...
> PS - I can dig your church story - I played in a church band for a few
> years, and while our two sound people were very nice folks rather than
> political animals like yours, neither one of them had even the vaguest
> notion of what the word 'mix' meant... Best story - while we normally
played
> mostly contemporary but soft acoustic type of stuff, during one service we
> played a real heavy, rocking tune that featured a prominent bass line (I
> think it was My Glorious). Our set-up was that while I ran thru a DI to
the
> board, I also split off from the DI into my bass amp on stage in front of
> me, to use it as my monitor. So I had my amp directly in front of me, loud
> enough that I could hear myself cleanly through the mix but no louder.
Then
> after the service, everyone in the congregation is coming up to me telling
> me what a great 'air bass' I played on that rocking song we did. I had no
> idea what they were talking about. Finally one of the members tells me how
> he loved watching how intense I seemed to be playing on that song, but
that
> there was no bass whatsoever in that song. So I went back into the
sanctuary
> and checked the board - the input switch on my channel was in the OFF
> position! When I caught up with my wife, she confirmed that she didn't
hear
> me at all through the entire service... Now don't you think a sound person
> would notice that the bass was completely missing from the mix? If they
had
> the even vaguest idea of what a mix was, you would!
>
> However, my wife also confirmed that I was a great 'air bass' player!
>
> David
>
>
> "js" <nothing AT nothing DOT com> wrote in message
> news:4812f5fe$0$7726$4c368faf@roadrunner . com ...
> > There was a time not too long ago when I was booking my band 2-5 nights
a
> > week by myself, booking for local 2 clubs, and taking other gigs. My
> > calendar was always full, as were my days - making packages, taking cold
> > calls or following up with clubs, taking calls from other bands, driving
> > across town to give some club owner a package for the 5th time, calling
my
> > guys with details about the next gig, etc.
> >
> > I spent my breaks outlining the finer points of the contract to the
> > client,
> > cutting checks, putting out fires, etc. I always knew what I was doing
on
> > NYE by August at the latest. One time, I actually had SIX different
offers
> > for NYE...in August.
> >
> > I loved it. I especially loved it when I pulled off a coup: like getting
a
> > CEO to write me a $1000 check for an extra hour of playing time, taking
a
> > nice big chunk off the top of each gig, or finagling a check, period,
when
> > we showed up to a wash-out with no contract.
> >
> >
> > But all things must come to an end. For a variety of economic,
political,
> > and health reasons, I had to step back from all of that. Like jeff, I
was
> > just burnt out.The stress of having to be "in charge" and in "ass
kicking"
> > mode all the time, combined with a chronic illness, really took it's
toll.
> >
> > I made enemies out of friends because they couldn't differentiate
between
> > business and personal, which sucked. I also found out who my friends
WERE,
> > and who was just kissing my ass.
> >
> > And I got REALLY tired of having to gear my set list to the fickle
> > idiots -
> > one eye on the crowd, the other eye on the manager, one ear on the
> > volume -
> > I barely had a chance to think about what *I* wanted to play.
> >
> > So when the bottom fell out of the local scene around '05, I took some
> > time
> > away from it all - I got a cushy zero pressure church gig, and started
> > working as a side man doing private/society and select pick up gigs. I
> > resolved to keep my mouth shut, to go with the flow, to play what's
> > needed,
> > to refrain from offering unsolicited gig advice, to refrain from
bitching
> > about tunes, or breaks, or pay. I was going to be the ideal side man, I
> > thought, since I know how hard it is to lead...
> >
> > I was ALSO going to take a lot of non-paying gigs, since the society
gigs
> > paid very well. And I'd have some weekends free for the wife. It's
> > win/win/win.
> >
> >
> > And this arrangement has worked fairly well for the last couple years,
> > severely erratic schedules notwithstanding.
> >
> > However, the "go along to get along" mentality has been wearing at me
like
> > Niagara Falls on a pebble.
> >
> > Some examples:
> >
> >
> > 1) The church I play at has a LOT of internal politics, most of which I
> > stay
> > away from. However, a big political issue is running sound. Two guys
have
> > staked a claim on is, and neither now ANYTHING about running sound.
> >
> > One day I come in to play (we're not allowed to use amps onstage;
> > everything
> > goes direct), and there is a massive noise gate on my bass. I have to
hit
> > the string so hard that it buzzed against the fretboard. I ask the
> > soundguy
> > to turn off the noise gate, please...What SHOULD have been a 10 second
> > operation turned into a week plus aggravation. They had NO IDEA what
noise
> > gate was or how it turn it off; they were trying to blame ME...and all
the
> > wile I was "strongly encouraged" not to interfere. Finally one day I
> > frikin
> > had it, snuck up to the soundboard, and basically TOLD the guy where the
> > gate was and how to turn it off. Problem solved. I fully expected to be
> > let
> > go for that "transgression", but nothing happened.
> >
> > 2) I've tried to book several original projects, without much success -
> > mostly because the guy that formed the project can't do it. What's
> > frustrating is that I go in with a businesslike attitude, and I'm
> > confronted
> > with hipsters and gatekeepers and cliques the likes of which I haven't
> > seen
> > since high school.
> >
> > Now, you gotta remember - I never did the "battle of the bands showcase"
> > thing. I went from playing in my basement to playing 4 nights a week, as
a
> > tennager. So the original music scene is a bit foreign to me.
> >
> > Apparently, in this scene you are supposed to kiss the ever-loving ass
of
> > the person who is in charge of booking XYZ venue, and bend over
backwards
> > to
> > convince them that you "want it" more than any other band - all for the
> > "privilege" of playing for free. FOR FREE!
> >
> > I, on the other hand, go in with the attitude that I am PROVIDING you
with
> > a band that can actually play their instruments, can control their
volume,
> > won't drive away paying customers, and is the perfect sound for the
genre
> > you are booking. In return you will give me a spot on the bill to
> > showcase
> > my group and sell CDs.
> >
> > And no, I'm not bringing you a "draw" for free. There is NO RISK
> > whatsoever
> > to you, so what does it matter if 1 or 1000 people are watching me play?
I
> > on the other hand, have to schlep my gear across town, set up, play and
> > break down - a labor for whaich I am usually paid in money rather than
> > sandwiches. I'll bug Aunt Mabel to come see me when I have a PAYING
"draw
> > vs. the door" gig, thanks.
> >
> > Such logic is not what they want to hear. It takes every ounce of
strength
> > for me not to just blurt out "Who the FUCK do you think you are,
> > manpurse?".
> > I see the young kids kiss ass to these hipsters, and I want to bitchslap
> > them.
> >
> >
> > 3) I "almost" did a gig last week with a young original singer I work
> > with.
> > Actually turned down a paying gig to do this one. She's nice, but not
real
> > good on follow-through - giving details to the band, communicating with
> > the
> > venue, planning the trip, etc.
> >
> > Gig was about 90 miles north of Charlotte. About halfway there, she says
> > "I've been trying to call this club all week, but the number is
> > disconnected. Do you think we should still go?"
> >
> > Were there not a fantastic brew pub close by the club where I knew she
> > would
> > buy us sympathy drinks, I would have told her to turn around.
> >
> > Instead we get there - 90 min. late, incidentally - and the place is
OPEN.
> > She had the wrong number. I got shitfaced at the pub down the street.
> >
> > Now, I COULD take care of all the details FOR her - and part of me
really,
> > REALLY wants to - but it would be a major pain in the ass for me (see
> > #1),
> > and she wouldn't learn a thing.
> >
> >
> > 4) Did a gig tonight with a great player who's new in town. He booked a
> > gig
> > at a club I used to play regularly. One day, they switched from paying a
> > flat fee to some sort of "tiered" system based on the till. I don't like
> > or
> > trust those kinds of gigs, so I stopped playing there. This guy quoted
me
> > a
> > flat fee at the old rate though, so I assumed the old system was back.
> >
> > Gig goes well, with a typical thin Friday turnout for that place.
Manager
> > tells us to knock off early - which *I* know means "get the fuck out of
> > here, I want to close up". I try to tell the leader this, but he insists
> > on
> > playing 2 more songs, I guess thinking he will impress them. All the
while
> > I
> > have a sneaking suspicion that we're not gonna get a guarantee...
> >
> > It takes every ounce of self control for me to keep from saying "Look,
> > they
> > don't give a fuck, because we're not getting the "big money" tonight
> > anyway.
> > Start packing up."
> >
> > Sure enough, the leader comes back all pissed off, trying to figure out
> > how
> > to tell us. I just cut him off and said "I know"...
> >
> >
> > Point being, I would have gotten all that shit squared away up front. Or
> > got
> > the money I thought I was promised. But I'm just the sideman...
> >
> >
> >
> > Sorry if this is just a rambling, pointless diatribe. The gist of it is
> > that
> > I'm both frustrated and torn. On one hand, I'm starting to crack from
the
> > pressure of being the "go along" guy, which I am most certainly not. On
> > another, although I'm healthy again, I dread the massive stress and time
> > constraints of being "in charge" again, and I'm in no hurry to be pulled
> > back into that.
> >
> > I don't know what to do.
> >
> >
>
>

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

On Apr 26, 4:28 am, "js" <nothing AT nothing DOT com> wrote:

> I don't know what to do.

I led most bands I have been in.
More out of necessity than desire.
If I left it up to the others we would be rehearsing in someones
basement for 2 years then it would fall apart because we don't have
gigs.
I guess you gotta do what you gotta do.
Especially if nobody else will do it.

Pt

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

> But all things must come to an end. For a variety of economic, political,
> and health reasons, I had to step back from all of that. Like jeff, I was
> just burnt out.The stress of having to be "in charge" and in "ass kicking"
> mode all the time, combined with a chronic illness, really took it's toll.

John, don't feel alone. What you've experienced is what anyone who has
ever run their own business experiences, every day. I see it happen all
the time to my clients, to my friends, and to myself. It's tough -- to
stay sane and not drive yourself to an early grave, you have to rely on
others to be smart, honest and hard-working. But people are naturally
stupid, greedy, dishonest and lazy. What the hell can you do?

A few things -- one, obviously, you have to avoid the stupidest,
greediest, most-dishonest and laziest people. Give everyone the benefit
of the doubt, give them one fair chance, and if they blow that test,
then don't give them a second chance. Don't be spiteful, don't hold a
grudge, be nice, but dammit, don't give them a second chance. If you
run into those few people that are truly smart, honest and hard-working,
don't let them get away!

How often do you see people that are burned-out, stressed and very
unhappy on account of a relationship (or relationships) with a bad
person who is sucking the life out of them? All the time. Just gotta
avoid those people. Don't be an "enabler." Stay objective, don't get
sucked in by someone's coolness, hip factor, or charisma. The ability
to recognize bad people and have the guts and determination to make an
immediate clean break from them is crucial to staying sane. No drama is
necessary, no big final scene, just walk away.

Two, keep everyone honest and above-board with very clear, plain-spoken,
written agreements. Contracts! How often do you see business deals
that went sour because it was a "handshake" deal, or it was just done
"because that's the way they're always done"? How often, after a big,
ugly business fiasco, do you hear the participants whining, "If you
can't take someone at their word, what's this world coming to?" or some
other such absurdity. Five thousand years of recorded human history is
apparently not enough to get the message through. Get everything nailed
down in writing, make it enforceable, get advance payments, keep
everyone honest. When people balk at that, then realize that you're
getting a big red flag waved in front of you -- honest people that fully
intend to honor their promises absolutely do not balk at committing
those promises to writing. If someone refuses to put an agreement in
writing, don't be surprised when they don't do what they said they were
going to do.

General rule: Do not trust anyone. Anyone! But always be the kind of
person that others can trust. Only good things can follow from this
rule. "Not trusting anyone" does not mean being paranoid or suspicious,
not at all. Be nice, enjoy others when you can, just act at all times
in your dealings with them as if you can't trust them. Then be
pleasantly surprised when they do the right thing. Keep everything
honest, be scrupulously honest yourself.

If you do all this, and people still keep disappointing you, well,
that's life. Have a beer.

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

Brian Running wrote:
> John, don't feel alone. What you've experienced is what anyone who has
> ever run their own business experiences, every day.

Yep. And to a degree some worker bees deal with similar issues,
depending on how high up in the company they are. But when running your
own business it is much worse.

> A few things -- one, obviously, you have to avoid the stupidest,
> greediest, most-dishonest and laziest people.

This can be hard to do, but you've gotta do it. Some folks never want to
turn away money, but sometimes you have to. Some clients you are simply
better off without.

> If you
> run into those few people that are truly smart, honest and hard-working,
> don't let them get away!

Unfortunately, a lot of people spend too much time trying to placate
their bad clients and take to good ones for granted (and subsequently
lose them).


> How often do you see people that are burned-out, stressed and very
> unhappy on account of a relationship (or relationships) with a bad
> person who is sucking the life out of them? All the time. Just gotta
> avoid those people. Don't be an "enabler."

I once told a guy he and his girlfriend were co-dependent drama queens.
He said, "I'm not co-dependent, but she is."

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

Agreed, but yet you face the eternal Club Booking Paradox:

Ask then to sign a contract and they refuse - because there are 20 other
acts waiting to take your place for no contract, and 1/2 the price. Make a
stink because they did not honor your oral agreement, and you don't play
there again - because there are 20 other acts waiting to take your place for
no contract, and 1/2 the price.

This is one of the reasons I went to society work. Everything is etched in
stone with the client, from money to breaks to buffet privileges.

While it's great for paying the bills, this traps you in a musical
straitjacket you can't get out of. And I definitely don't want to become
"That guy" - the lounge lizard whose chops are dulled by years of underuse,
hacking his way through "Just a Gigolo" in 2 keys at once, just so uncle
Murray can look like a big shot for 5 minutes. It's a nice place to visit,
but I can't live there.

Truthfully, I KNOW the ins an outs of club booking from both sides of the
fence. I know how to haggle; I know how to use the active voice ("I need you
to do this") instead of the "polite" voice ("could you please, when you get
a chance?"). I know what buzzwords to say to get us in the door, etc.


But the fact of the matter is the contract situation is not going to change,
here or most anywhere. Which means I have to fight for every little thing on
every gig - which I don't know if I'm ready to do again. There's a massive
mental chasm between "knowing" and "doing".


Does that make any sense?


"Brian Running" <brunning@XXameritechXX . net > wrote in message
news:UHHQj.10920$2g1.2439@nlpi068.nbdc.sbc . com ...
> > But all things must come to an end. For a variety of economic,
political,
> > and health reasons, I had to step back from all of that. Like jeff, I
was
> > just burnt out.The stress of having to be "in charge" and in "ass
kicking"
> > mode all the time, combined with a chronic illness, really took it's
toll.
>
> John, don't feel alone. What you've experienced is what anyone who has
> ever run their own business experiences, every day. I see it happen all
> the time to my clients, to my friends, and to myself. It's tough -- to
> stay sane and not drive yourself to an early grave, you have to rely on
> others to be smart, honest and hard-working. But people are naturally
> stupid, greedy, dishonest and lazy. What the hell can you do?
>
> A few things -- one, obviously, you have to avoid the stupidest,
> greediest, most-dishonest and laziest people. Give everyone the benefit
> of the doubt, give them one fair chance, and if they blow that test,
> then don't give them a second chance. Don't be spiteful, don't hold a
> grudge, be nice, but dammit, don't give them a second chance. If you
> run into those few people that are truly smart, honest and hard-working,
> don't let them get away!
>
> How often do you see people that are burned-out, stressed and very
> unhappy on account of a relationship (or relationships) with a bad
> person who is sucking the life out of them? All the time. Just gotta
> avoid those people. Don't be an "enabler." Stay objective, don't get
> sucked in by someone's coolness, hip factor, or charisma. The ability
> to recognize bad people and have the guts and determination to make an
> immediate clean break from them is crucial to staying sane. No drama is
> necessary, no big final scene, just walk away.
>
> Two, keep everyone honest and above-board with very clear, plain-spoken,
> written agreements. Contracts! How often do you see business deals
> that went sour because it was a "handshake" deal, or it was just done
> "because that's the way they're always done"? How often, after a big,
> ugly business fiasco, do you hear the participants whining, "If you
> can't take someone at their word, what's this world coming to?" or some
> other such absurdity. Five thousand years of recorded human history is
> apparently not enough to get the message through. Get everything nailed
> down in writing, make it enforceable, get advance payments, keep
> everyone honest. When people balk at that, then realize that you're
> getting a big red flag waved in front of you -- honest people that fully
> intend to honor their promises absolutely do not balk at committing
> those promises to writing. If someone refuses to put an agreement in
> writing, don't be surprised when they don't do what they said they were
> going to do.
>
> General rule: Do not trust anyone. Anyone! But always be the kind of
> person that others can trust. Only good things can follow from this
> rule. "Not trusting anyone" does not mean being paranoid or suspicious,
> not at all. Be nice, enjoy others when you can, just act at all times
> in your dealings with them as if you can't trust them. Then be
> pleasantly surprised when they do the right thing. Keep everything
> honest, be scrupulously honest yourself.
>
> If you do all this, and people still keep disappointing you, well,
> that's life. Have a beer.

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

> Which means I have to fight for every little thing on
> every gig - which I don't know if I'm ready to do again. There's a massive
> mental chasm between "knowing" and "doing".
>
> Does that make any sense?
>


You can't handle the "society straightjacket", although the return is
good. Would you rather dig ditches?

You can't handle the race to the bottom, who drops their pants first
mentality of the clubs. Well, welcome to reality. ( I won't go into
why it's so , we both know) If that's crap, don't do that as well. I
assume from your post you're at least getting some "artistic"
satisfaction there.

Truth is : For 99.999 % of us there's always a balance between
financial return and artistic freedom.

Some advice. If you can't be with the one you love, learn to love the
one you're with.
Another small piece of advice: Don't blame others for your situations.
That's a soul sucking response. Deal with it, or drop it.

Shakespeare : "For there is nothing either good or
bad, but thinking makes it so."

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

js wrote:

> Does that make any sense?

Yes. You want artistic and financial freedom with no stress - and all
without putting in a lot of effort. Who doesn't?

Prioritize. Figure out how much money you need, how much effort you're
willing to expend, how much stress you're willing to endure, and how
much artistic freedom you need. Then follow Brian's solid advice about
running your own business while keeping those goals in mind.

I'll repeat something I've told you before: I think you deal too much in
extremes. There's plenty of middle ground between being a lounge lizard
and being an artist living out of his car in order to deliver his
message. There's a middle ground between running the whole show and
sitting back and watching a slow motion train wreck.

You also seem to like "Rules for Life" whereas I, to steal a phrase,
would say they are more like guidelines. Everything is a situation.
Sure, lots of people won't sign contracts, but some will. Some of those
who won't sign might be amenable to receiving a piece of paper that
basically outlines the deal that was discussed. Very few things in this
world are 100% one way or another.

Most importantly, and I mean this sincerely and without malice, I think
you need to take a *very* hard look at yourself. We *all* have to deal
with the world in one way or another. For each of us it's one person
versus a few billion.

If you are stressed out, frustrated, and unhappy, try to figure out why
*you* are at fault. Keep in mind that quite often the differences
between expectations and actual results are what make us unhappy. You
probably have issues in both your effect on the results as well as your
expectations.

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

On Apr 26, 10:17 am, Brian Running <brunn...@XXameritechXX . net > wrote:
> How often do you see people that are burned-out, stressed and very
> unhappy on account of a relationship (or relationships) with a bad
> person who is sucking the life out of them?  All the time.  Just gotta=

> avoid those people.  Don't be an "enabler."  Stay objective, don't get=

> sucked in by someone's coolness, hip factor, or charisma.  The ability
> to recognize bad people and have the guts and determination to make an
> immediate clean break from them is crucial to staying sane.  No drama is=

> necessary, no big final scene, just walk away.

It's taken 39 years for me to figure out that this is great advice.
I'm a "caregiver" by my nature... which means I try to keep everyone
happy, and take care of all the details.

The problem is I'm NOT a detail person!

Finally, I'm cutting the strings on relationships that harm me. It's
hard, but necessary. The group of people I spend most of my time with
these days are positive, motivated people, and it's seriously
improving my world!

Great advice, Brian! Thanks!

Corey

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

js wrote:
> There was a time not too long ago when I was booking my band 2-5 nights a
> week by myself, booking for local 2 clubs, and taking other gigs. My
> calendar was always full, as were my days - making packages, taking cold
> calls or following up with clubs, taking calls from other bands, driving
> across town to give some club owner a package for the 5th time, calling my
> guys with details about the next gig, etc.
>
> I spent my breaks outlining the finer points of the contract to the client,
> cutting checks, putting out fires, etc. I always knew what I was doing on
> NYE by August at the latest. One time, I actually had SIX different offers
> for NYE...in August.
>
> I loved it. I especially loved it when I pulled off a coup: like getting a
> CEO to write me a $1000 check for an extra hour of playing time, taking a
> nice big chunk off the top of each gig, or finagling a check, period, when
> we showed up to a wash-out with no contract.
>
>
> But all things must come to an end. For a variety of economic, political,
> and health reasons, I had to step back from all of that. Like jeff, I was
> just burnt out.The stress of having to be "in charge" and in "ass kicking"
> mode all the time, combined with a chronic illness, really took it's toll.
>

Other than "the bottom falling out", couldn't you get any help from the
other guys in the band?

I'm mostly worthless at this with my band because all contact must be
made during business hours, and I can't really do that due to my day
job. I have, but nothing fruitful.

Seriously, though - it sounds like you were really being hard on yourself.

> I made enemies out of friends because they couldn't differentiate between
> business and personal, which sucked. I also found out who my friends WERE,
> and who was just kissing my ass.
>

Sounds valuable, then. There's more people you don't wanna work with
out there than people you *do* wanna work with.

> And I got REALLY tired of having to gear my set list to the fickle idiots -
> one eye on the crowd, the other eye on the manager, one ear on the volume -
> I barely had a chance to think about what *I* wanted to play.
>

I think maybe you should have given more thought to what you
wanted to play, then.

> So when the bottom fell out of the local scene around '05, I took some time
> away from it all - I got a cushy zero pressure church gig, and started
> working as a side man doing private/society and select pick up gigs. I
> resolved to keep my mouth shut, to go with the flow, to play what's needed,
> to refrain from offering unsolicited gig advice, to refrain from bitching
> about tunes, or breaks, or pay. I was going to be the ideal side man, I
> thought, since I know how hard it is to lead...
>
> I was ALSO going to take a lot of non-paying gigs, since the society gigs
> paid very well. And I'd have some weekends free for the wife. It's
> win/win/win.
>
>
> And this arrangement has worked fairly well for the last couple years,
> severely erratic schedules notwithstanding.
>
> However, the "go along to get along" mentality has been wearing at me like
> Niagara Falls on a pebble.
>
> Some examples:
>
>
> 1) The church I play at has a LOT of internal politics, most of which I stay
> away from. However, a big political issue is running sound. Two guys have
> staked a claim on is, and neither now ANYTHING about running sound.
>
> One day I come in to play (we're not allowed to use amps onstage; everything
> goes direct), and there is a massive noise gate on my bass. I have to hit
> the string so hard that it buzzed against the fretboard. I ask the soundguy
> to turn off the noise gate, please...What SHOULD have been a 10 second
> operation turned into a week plus aggravation. They had NO IDEA what noise
> gate was or how it turn it off; they were trying to blame ME...and all the
> wile I was "strongly encouraged" not to interfere. Finally one day I frikin
> had it, snuck up to the soundboard, and basically TOLD the guy where the
> gate was and how to turn it off. Problem solved. I fully expected to be let
> go for that "transgression", but nothing happened.
>

I can't imagine why anything *would* happen. Unfortunately, people who
don't know what they are doing feel obligated to build a model of an
activity as "governance", and you have to cross lines to get things
done. Anybody with any time in a corporation lives with this scenario
every day.

This is just a Dilbert cartoon. Do the right thing anyway.

> 2) I've tried to book several original projects, without much success -
> mostly because the guy that formed the project can't do it. What's
> frustrating is that I go in with a businesslike attitude, and I'm confronted
> with hipsters and gatekeepers and cliques the likes of which I haven't seen
> since high school.
>
> Now, you gotta remember - I never did the "battle of the bands showcase"
> thing. I went from playing in my basement to playing 4 nights a week, as a
> tennager. So the original music scene is a bit foreign to me.
>
> Apparently, in this scene you are supposed to kiss the ever-loving ass of
> the person who is in charge of booking XYZ venue, and bend over backwards to
> convince them that you "want it" more than any other band - all for the
> "privilege" of playing for free. FOR FREE!
>
> I, on the other hand, go in with the attitude that I am PROVIDING you with
> a band that can actually play their instruments, can control their volume,
> won't drive away paying customers, and is the perfect sound for the genre
> you are booking. In return you will give me a spot on the bill to showcase
> my group and sell CDs.
>
> And no, I'm not bringing you a "draw" for free. There is NO RISK whatsoever
> to you, so what does it matter if 1 or 1000 people are watching me play? I
> on the other hand, have to schlep my gear across town, set up, play and
> break down - a labor for whaich I am usually paid in money rather than
> sandwiches. I'll bug Aunt Mabel to come see me when I have a PAYING "draw
> vs. the door" gig, thanks.
>
> Such logic is not what they want to hear. It takes every ounce of strength
> for me not to just blurt out "Who the FUCK do you think you are, manpurse?".
> I see the young kids kiss ass to these hipsters, and I want to bitchslap
> them.
>
>

When I did originals band ( not what you're thinking of, for sure ), we
simply mixed the originals in with cover sets, until the originals
slowly pushed out the covers. Don't do those downtown suffer-fests like
that. I believe 90% of what a manager brings to a young band, especially
young bands *today*, is simple ... assertiveness training. If you're
working with these kids ( of any age ), you gotta let 'em learn
that part, too - or you suffer.

I think mostly because the economy has been really good for about 25
years now, kids are passive-aggressive little shitebags. They dunno.
They can always go barista at Starbucks, so there's no drive. Of course
exceptions exist, but that's a semi-trend ( I have two daughters in
the early 20s, so....)

The only real-life they've seen *IS* high school.

> 3) I "almost" did a gig last week with a young original singer I work with.
> Actually turned down a paying gig to do this one. She's nice, but not real
> good on follow-through - giving details to the band, communicating with the
> venue, planning the trip, etc.
>
> Gig was about 90 miles north of Charlotte. About halfway there, she says
> "I've been trying to call this club all week, but the number is
> disconnected. Do you think we should still go?"
>
> Were there not a fantastic brew pub close by the club where I knew she would
> buy us sympathy drinks, I would have told her to turn around.
>
> Instead we get there - 90 min. late, incidentally - and the place is OPEN.
> She had the wrong number. I got shitfaced at the pub down the street.
>
> Now, I COULD take care of all the details FOR her - and part of me really,
> REALLY wants to - but it would be a major pain in the ass for me (see #1),
> and she wouldn't learn a thing.
>
>

Always manage from below. Trust, but verify. But make her pay for you
having to do it. Not money, but ... guff. What you are doing in this
case is investing in her for potential work later on. Only way they will
learn. She needs the training, it shouldn't cost that much to you.

> 4) Did a gig tonight with a great player who's new in town. He booked a gig
> at a club I used to play regularly. One day, they switched from paying a
> flat fee to some sort of "tiered" system based on the till. I don't like or
> trust those kinds of gigs, so I stopped playing there. This guy quoted me a
> flat fee at the old rate though, so I assumed the old system was back.
>
> Gig goes well, with a typical thin Friday turnout for that place. Manager
> tells us to knock off early - which *I* know means "get the fuck out of
> here, I want to close up". I try to tell the leader this, but he insists on
> playing 2 more songs, I guess thinking he will impress them. All the while I
> have a sneaking suspicion that we're not gonna get a guarantee...
>
> It takes every ounce of self control for me to keep from saying "Look, they
> don't give a fuck, because we're not getting the "big money" tonight anyway.
> Start packing up."
>
> Sure enough, the leader comes back all pissed off, trying to figure out how
> to tell us. I just cut him off and said "I know"...
>
>

If they ain't got it, they can't very will give it to you...

> Point being, I would have gotten all that shit squared away up front. Or got
> the money I thought I was promised. But I'm just the sideman...
>
>
>
> Sorry if this is just a rambling, pointless diatribe. The gist of it is that
> I'm both frustrated and torn. On one hand, I'm starting to crack from the
> pressure of being the "go along" guy, which I am most certainly not. On
> another, although I'm healthy again, I dread the massive stress and time
> constraints of being "in charge" again, and I'm in no hurry to be pulled
> back into that.
>
> I don't know what to do.
>
>

I think you like being in charge, but you just have to figure out a way
of being in charge that works for you. But if the bottom really did fall
out, it don't matter anyway.

--
Les Cargill

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

On Apr 26, 5:28 am, "js" <nothing AT nothing DOT com> wrote:

> Sorry if this is just a rambling, pointless diatribe. The gist of it is that
> I'm both frustrated and torn. On one hand, I'm starting to crack from the
> pressure of being the "go along" guy, which I am most certainly not. On
> another, although I'm healthy again, I dread the massive stress and time
> constraints of being "in charge" again, and I'm in no hurry to be pulled
> back into that.
>
> I don't know what to do.

This is the timeless lament of "people who know how to do things"! If
you have the ability to do something reasonably well in a modern world
where finding someone who can count change from a dollar is a major
search, frustration tends to be close at hand.

HOWEVER. What you have to do is adjust your attitude. Instead of
trying to do everyone's job for them (which you easily could do
because you are competent) you have to take the attitude "I COULD do
this job, but it's not mine to do." THEREFORE you decide it's time
for you to take the role of "Zen Master". The TRUE question is not
"can *I* do this job?" But rather can *YOU* do this job! Your role
then as accomplished "man of the world" has to become: "I've paid my
dues and I can do this job, but my time is past and now it's YOUR turn
to learn how. Therefore, I will help you all learn what I know and
have learned through experience!"

So, armed with your new attitude of "teacher", do just like your rant
here. Start PREDICTING in advance to people in charge what you think
is going to happen and give them advice of how to deal with it. At
first they may not listen to you, but as you continue to hit the nail
on the head and show your willingness to share what you know, they'll
start to realize that they need to start listening to you (or well,
many of them will!) :-)

That way you don't have to DO the job, and you don't have to "just" go
along either. And hopefully you'll eventually make some folks better
at what they do as well. This is what I try to do. And my advice to
you is that although it's easy to get discouraged and start thinking
that all your efforts to teach people are being totally resisted and
you are wasting your time, take my word for it, eventually the day
will come when suddenly you will start to see the things you said
coming out of other people's mouths and you'll realize you have
accomplished FAR more influence than you ever imagined you did!
That's just the way it works.

Re: Ramblings: Self Booking

On Apr 26, 1:29 pm, Benj <bjac...@iwaynet . net > wrote:
> On Apr 26, 5:28 am, "js" <nothing AT nothing DOT com> wrote:
>
> > Sorry if this is just a rambling, pointless diatribe. The gist of it is that
> > I'm both frustrated and torn. On one hand, I'm starting to crack from the
> > pressure of being the "go along" guy, which I am most certainly not. On
> > another, although I'm healthy again, I dread the massive stress and time
> > constraints of being "in charge" again, and I'm in no hurry to be pulled
> > back into that.
>
> > I don't know what to do.
>
> This is the timeless lament of "people who know how to do things"! If
> you have the ability to do something reasonably well in a modern world
> where finding someone who can count change from a dollar is a major
> search, frustration tends to be close at hand.
>
> HOWEVER. What you have to do is adjust your attitude. Instead of
> trying to do everyone's job for them (which you easily could do
> because you are competent) you have to take the attitude "I COULD do
> this job, but it's not mine to do." THEREFORE you decide it's time
> for you to take the role of "Zen Master". The TRUE question is not
> "can *I* do this job?" But rather can *YOU* do this job! Your role
> then as accomplished "man of the world" has to become: "I've paid my
> dues and I can do this job, but my time is past and now it's YOUR turn
> to learn how. Therefore, I will help you all learn what I know and
> have learned through experience!"
>
> So, armed with your new attitude of "teacher", do just like your rant
> here. Start PREDICTING in advance to people in charge what you think
> is going to happen and give them advice of how to deal with it. At
> first they may not listen to you, but as you continue to hit the nail
> on the head and show your willingness to share what you know, they'll
> start to realize that they need to start listening to you (or well,
> many of them will!) :-)
>
> That way you don't have to DO the job, and you don't have to "just" go
> along either. And hopefully you'll eventually make some folks better
> at what they do as well. This is what I try to do. And my advice to
> you is that although it's easy to get discouraged and start thinking
> that all your efforts to teach people are being totally resisted and
> you are wasting your time, take my word for it, eventually the day
> will come when suddenly you will start to see the things you said
> coming out of other people's mouths and you'll realize you have
> accomplished FAR more influence than you ever imagined you did!
> That's just the way it works.

good advice!