Best way to dump a body?

Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where he
lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away. Is
this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of town be a
better place for his body?

JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where he
> lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away. Is
> this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of town be a
> better place for his body?

Whatever you do, be careful you don't create a public nuisance. Those
disorderly conduct charges are a bitch.

--
Write a wise saying and your name will live forever.
- Anonymous

"Jim Carr" <newsgroups@azwebpages.com> wrote in message
news:9E1Wj.8634$bX3.6684@newsfe08.phx...
> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
>> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where he
>> lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away. Is
>> this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of town be
>> a better place for his body?
>
> Whatever you do, be careful you don't create a public nuisance. Those
> disorderly conduct charges are a bitch.


OK. Good idea. :-)

"JoeSpareBedroom" <dishborealis@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:0G1Wj.45136$ye3.21356@fe119.usenetserver.com...
> "Jim Carr" <newsgroups@azwebpages.com> wrote in message
> news:9E1Wj.8634$bX3.6684@newsfe08.phx...
>> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>>> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
>>> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where
>>> he lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away.
>>> Is this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of
>>> town be a better place for his body?
>>
>> Whatever you do, be careful you don't create a public nuisance. Those
>> disorderly conduct charges are a bitch.
>
>
> OK. Good idea. :-)
>

If you live near a metro area, just put the body on the subway and leave him
there. Or you could use a bus. Preferably one that is going out of town.

-DA

On May 12, 4:46 pm, "Axtman" <daxtATpacifierDOTcom> wrote:
> "JoeSpareBedroom" <dishborea...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
>
> news:0G1Wj.45136$ye3.21356@fe119.usenetserver.com...
>
> > "Jim Carr" <newsgro...@azwebpages.com> wrote in message
> >news:9E1Wj.8634$bX3.6684@newsfe08.phx...
> >> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
> >>> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
> >>> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where
> >>> he lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away.
> >>> Is this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of
> >>> town be a better place for his body?
>
> >> Whatever you do, be careful you don't create a public nuisance. Those
> >> disorderly conduct charges are a bitch.
>
> > OK. Good idea. :-)
>
> If you live near a metro area, just put the body on the subway and leave him
> there. Or you could use a bus. Preferably one that is going out of town.
>
> -DA


Take him to a Guitar Center, prop him up behind a display set, and see
how long it takes before the teenage manager notices....

"BW" <barrybassist@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:2faefb36-0314-4d6d-b62d-be6ddd6b34fc@e53g2000hsa.googlegroups.com...
> On May 12, 4:46 pm, "Axtman" <daxtATpacifierDOTcom> wrote:
>> "JoeSpareBedroom" <dishborea...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
>>
>> news:0G1Wj.45136$ye3.21356@fe119.usenetserver.com...
>>
>> > "Jim Carr" <newsgro...@azwebpages.com> wrote in message
>> >news:9E1Wj.8634$bX3.6684@newsfe08.phx...
>> >> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>> >>> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL -
>> >>> won't
>> >>> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know
>> >>> where
>> >>> he lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes
>> >>> away.
>> >>> Is this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of
>> >>> town be a better place for his body?
>>
>> >> Whatever you do, be careful you don't create a public nuisance. Those
>> >> disorderly conduct charges are a bitch.
>>
>> > OK. Good idea. :-)
>>
>> If you live near a metro area, just put the body on the subway and leave
>> him
>> there. Or you could use a bus. Preferably one that is going out of
>> town.
>>
>> -DA
>
>
> Take him to a Guitar Center, prop him up behind a display set, and see
> how long it takes before the teenage manager notices....

I think we have a solution. :)

"BW" <barrybassist@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:2faefb36-0314-4d6d-b62d-be6ddd6b34fc@e53g2000hsa.googlegroups.com...
> On May 12, 4:46 pm, "Axtman" <daxtATpacifierDOTcom> wrote:
>> "JoeSpareBedroom" <dishborea...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
>>
>> news:0G1Wj.45136$ye3.21356@fe119.usenetserver.com...
>>
>> > "Jim Carr" <newsgro...@azwebpages.com> wrote in message
>> >news:9E1Wj.8634$bX3.6684@newsfe08.phx...
>> >> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>> >>> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone
>> >>> AWOL - won't
>> >>> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know
>> >>> where
>> >>> he lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5
>> >>> minutes away.
>> >>> Is this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part
>> >>> of
>> >>> town be a better place for his body?
>>
>> >> Whatever you do, be careful you don't create a public nuisance.
>> >> Those
>> >> disorderly conduct charges are a bitch.
>>
>> > OK. Good idea. :-)
>>
>> If you live near a metro area, just put the body on the subway and
>> leave him
>> there. Or you could use a bus. Preferably one that is going out of
>> town.
>>
>> -DA
>
>
> Take him to a Guitar Center, prop him up behind a display set, and see
> how long it takes before the teenage manager notices....

This may be what he's doing already ...

-S-

"JoeSpareBedroom" <dishborealis@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:0G1Wj.45136$ye3.21356@fe119.usenetserver.com...
> "Jim Carr" <newsgroups@azwebpages.com> wrote in message
> news:9E1Wj.8634$bX3.6684@newsfe08.phx...
>> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>>> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
>>> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where
>>> he lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away.
>>> Is this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of
>>> town be a better place for his body?
>>
>> Whatever you do, be careful you don't create a public nuisance. Those
>> disorderly conduct charges are a bitch.
>
>
> OK. Good idea. :-)
>
Why not prop him up beside the jukebox, put some sand in his boots and put a
strong drink in his hand?

Gerry

"pTooner" <someguy@onthe.net> wrote in message
news:KYfXj.46570$3v1.31075@bignews3.bellsouth.net...
>
> "JoeSpareBedroom" <dishborealis@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> news:0G1Wj.45136$ye3.21356@fe119.usenetserver.com...
>> "Jim Carr" <newsgroups@azwebpages.com> wrote in message
>> news:9E1Wj.8634$bX3.6684@newsfe08.phx...
>>> JoeSpareBedroom wrote:
>>>> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL -
>>>> won't respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know
>>>> where he lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5
>>>> minutes away. Is this the right way, or would a dumpster in a
>>>> rat-infested part of town be a better place for his body?
>>>
>>> Whatever you do, be careful you don't create a public nuisance. Those
>>> disorderly conduct charges are a bitch.
>>
>>
>> OK. Good idea. :-)
>>
> Why not prop him up beside the jukebox, put some sand in his boots and put
> a strong drink in his hand?
>
> Gerry
>


I've met a few people like that. Two, last night, as a matter of fact.

JoeSpareBedroom <dishborealis@yahoo.com> wrote:

> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where he
> lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away. Is
> this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of town be a
> better place for his body?

Well, your first line holds the answer. Big metal bathtub, hydrochloric
acid - very popular way of disposing of bodies.

Of course, when you get to his house and discover that the reason for
his absence is that the last band got to him first, and they'd put even
less thought into body disposal than you have, you're going to start
feeling bad.

--- Derek

--
Derek Tearne - derek@url.co.nz
Many Hands - Trans Cultural Music from Aotearoa/New Zealand
http://www.manyhands.co.nz/

"Derek Tearne" <derek@url.co.nz> wrote in message
news:1igvi8z.au2hyru8g9t7N%derek@url.co.nz...
> JoeSpareBedroom <dishborealis@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
>> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
>> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where he
>> lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away. Is
>> this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of town be
>> a
>> better place for his body?
>
> Well, your first line holds the answer. Big metal bathtub, hydrochloric
> acid - very popular way of disposing of bodies.
>
> Of course, when you get to his house and discover that the reason for
> his absence is that the last band got to him first, and they'd put even
> less thought into body disposal than you have, you're going to start
> feeling bad.
>
> --- Derek


Your suggestion (the acid) is disgusting. I'll get on it right away.

Just get him to join Spinal Tap.

SotR

JoeSpareBedroom <dishborealis@yahoo.com> wrote:

> "Derek Tearne" <derek@url.co.nz> wrote in message
> news:1igvi8z.au2hyru8g9t7N%derek@url.co.nz...

>
> Your suggestion (the acid) is disgusting. I'll get on it right away.

If anyone asks, especially member of the constabulary, you heard about
it on CSI, BONES or 'New Tricks'[1] or that you found these sites on the
internet.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_George_Haigh
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hawley_Harvey_Crippen

--- Derek

[1] BBC Crime Drama, specifically episode 7, series 2, where metal baths
and their potential/frequent historical role in body disposal turns out
to be a massive red herring, or guppy or carp.


--
Derek Tearne - derek@url.co.nz
Many Hands - Trans Cultural Music from Aotearoa/New Zealand
http://www.manyhands.co.nz/

"Derek Tearne" <derek@url.co.nz> wrote in message
news:1igvi8z.au2hyru8g9t7N%derek@url.co.nz...
> JoeSpareBedroom <dishborealis@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
>> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
>> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where he
>> lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away. Is
>> this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of town be
>> a
>> better place for his body?
>
> Well, your first line holds the answer. Big metal bathtub, hydrochloric
> acid - very popular way of disposing of bodies.
>
Brick Top: You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece.
Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile
it all together.
Sol: Would someone mind telling me, who are you?
Brick Top: And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them,
because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover,
now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to
starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will
look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims,
and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do
this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig
shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least
sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who
keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in
about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of
uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".

Glenn D.

On May 13, 10:09 am, "Glenn Dowdy" <glenn.no.do...@hp.spam.com> wrote:
> "Derek Tearne" <de...@url.co.nz> wrote in message
>
> news:1igvi8z.au2hyru8g9t7N%derek@url.co.nz...> JoeSpareBedroom <dishborea...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
> >> Fourth drummer in a month down the drain. This one has gone AWOL - won't
> >> respond to phone messages about scheduling next practice. I know where he
> >> lives. I have a boat, chain, cinder blocks, and water 5 minutes away. Is
> >> this the right way, or would a dumpster in a rat-infested part of town be
> >> a
> >> better place for his body?
>
> > Well, your first line holds the answer. Big metal bathtub, hydrochloric
> > acid - very popular way of disposing of bodies.
>
> Brick Top: You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece.
> Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile
> it all together.
> Sol: Would someone mind telling me, who are you?
> Brick Top: And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them,
> because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover,
> now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to
> starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will
> look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims,
> and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do
> this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig
> shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least
> sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who
> keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in
> about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of
> uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".
>
> Glenn D.

I love that movie.

Corey